Talking about myself is something very new. Despite having experienced a relationship with a lot of emotional and financial dependence, I am a woman who doesn't like to depend on anyone, and every day I have been fighting to achieve my goals. My dream is to be someone that my children can look up to and be proud to say: "That's my mother."

I got pregnant at the age of 16 in a very premature relationship. In that relationship, I subjected myself to a lot of physical and psychological violence. But living in Paraty (RJ), a small town, the moral violence affected me a lot because I worried about what people would think and say about me. I couldn't hold my head up high in the street because I felt ashamed. Everyone knew he cheated on me and was very aggressive. Whenever I tried to leave, he would invent stories, saying that I was immature and not being a good mother, accusing me of trying to destroy our family.

He was very persistent in trying to make me stay in that situation. This situation also ended up on social media with mean and offensive comments. In school, I felt really bad seeing the looks and fingers pointing at me. That's one of the reasons why I stopped going to classes and started avoiding leaving the house.

With this isolation, I turned a blind eye to everything that was happening and put all my effort into making that abusive relationship work. I was desperate, I just wanted to have a normal family, and that's why I never reported him. Today, I know that there is no right standard for a normal or perfect family; the foundation needs to be respect and love in equal measure.

Many times, I tried to leave, but the dependency made me go back. It took me a while, but I let go of fear, went through psychological counseling to better understand everything and see my worth and potential. I started practicing sports: jiu-jitsu empowered me, I learned to defend myself and respect my limits. But it was mainly through soccer that I realized I could achieve anything I wanted. The advice I would give to other girls/women is: never allow yourself to be in a situation where you feel vulnerable. Be strong and courageous to leave the dependency zone. Face your fears, prioritize yourself always!

*This was written based on Joana's story.